So much water has flown under the bridge...I am no closer than I was 2 years ago to loving myself.
I've no idea what that means. Self care seems like another hard task for an already overwhelmed person. So I careen towards disaster...not knowing what the heck else to do.
Instead of my usual reading about autism, I've been taking a break and reading about understanding men, women etc. in an effort to improve things. Not that it needed improving. Oh no, it's perfect! What? If I sweep things away under the carpet, do they still exist?
While I have undeniably learned a lot about how men and women process things differently, think differently, expect different things from a relationship etc., mostly I am filled with rage that I am not a man! I wish I had the privilege of being a man, being able to automatically focus on my career, have a wife cook, clean and keep house for me (no matter how badly).
I've no idea what that means. Self care seems like another hard task for an already overwhelmed person. So I careen towards disaster...not knowing what the heck else to do.
Instead of my usual reading about autism, I've been taking a break and reading about understanding men, women etc. in an effort to improve things. Not that it needed improving. Oh no, it's perfect! What? If I sweep things away under the carpet, do they still exist?
While I have undeniably learned a lot about how men and women process things differently, think differently, expect different things from a relationship etc., mostly I am filled with rage that I am not a man! I wish I had the privilege of being a man, being able to automatically focus on my career, have a wife cook, clean and keep house for me (no matter how badly).
Posts
