Wednesday, December 21, 2016

So much for loving myself

So much water has flown under the bridge...I am no closer than I was 2 years ago to loving myself.
I've no idea what that means. Self care seems like another hard task for an already overwhelmed person. So I careen towards disaster...not knowing what the heck else to do.

Instead of my usual reading about autism, I've been taking a break and reading about understanding men, women etc. in an effort to improve things. Not that it needed improving. Oh no, it's perfect! What? If I sweep things away under the carpet, do they still exist?

While I have undeniably learned a lot about how men and women process things differently, think differently, expect different things from a relationship etc., mostly I am filled with rage that I am not a man! I wish I had the privilege of being a man, being able to automatically focus on my career, have a wife cook, clean and keep house for me (no matter how badly).